Realism and Aspiration

yellout-800px“Let’s make it slightly more difficult for people to buy guns.”


“Yes, sir, I believe that’s why we call them criminals.”


“Right. I’m sure the course of action they’d recommend is to do nothing. If you’ll check the polls you’ll find that muggers, thieves, rapists and murderers all strongly agree that we should do nothing about guns. Are there any other policy areas you’d like to consult them on?”

“No. And don’t ask them. We don’t want to annoy them. They’re heavily armed, you know. What else have you got?

“There’s a proposal out there that maybe health care and education ought to be part of the social contract.”

“Contract? Did I sign that?

“You don’t actually sign it. It’s just something that happens when you’re born.”

“Like my apartment houses?”

“No sir, that was was your father.”

“He was the best.”

“Of course, sir. No, the social contract means that everyone has a responsibility to contribute positively to society and should be able to expect a certain level of security in return.”

“I thought we weren’t talking about guns any more.”

“We aren’t, sir. We’re talking about things like health care and education.”

“Hey, if you can afford it, great!”

“That’s the point sir. The proposal is that everyone pitches in together so that everyone has access to quality healthcare and education.”

“Everyone? Together? That sounds like … socialism … or something.”

“Yes, sir, though I believe it’s been called ‘civilization’ for a bit longer.”

“Still sounds fishy. Don’t like it. Next?”

“Very good sir. Well, there is this proposal that large banks and other financial institutions shouldn’t be able to crash the economy if they make poor decisions.”

“Hmmmm. What do the people who run the banks and other financial institutions think?”

“Oh, they quite hate the idea.”

“Then why are you bringing this up? Since when do we tell people they have to do things they don’t want to?”


“Who? Sounds foreign.”

“Yes sir.”

“Great meeting. The best, really. Can we table everything else until later?”

“Of course, sir. Shall I call Mrs. Trump?”

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